Dear Friends of the Otherworldly and Unattainable,
The new Soft Speaker (Sanftsprecher) website is now at your disposal and offers the highest quality auditory indulgences available. You are not required to agree to any unsavory terms or conditions. Feel free to explore the site at your leisure and should you have any queries or would simply like to convey a bit of constructive criticism, please do so here in the Soft Speaker International Communication Centre (Internationales Sanftsprecherkommunikationszentrum) or contact us discreetly via email to email@example.com.
With Delightful Enthusiasm,
Blair, Darren, Joe, Nick and Paul